Reduce your stress this Christmas

Christmas is meant to be a time for kindness, fun and love. Unfortunately it is often the opposite for many people, because instead of focusing on the blessings in life, it can pose a time to focus on lack - particularly when loved ones have been lost, are sick or are no longer on speaking terms. 

The true meaning of Christmas is signified beautifully in this early definition found in The American magazine, vol. 28 (1889), pg 742:

"to give up one's very self — to think only of others — how to bring the greatest happiness to others — that is the true meaning of Christmas"

Modern life has confused the true meaning of Christmas with the size, quality and number of Christmas presents you give and receive. But the true meaning of Christmas lies in the warmth and love you can bring to your life and to the lives of those you love during this festive season. 

Just think about the difference you could make to your Christmas table by taking the time to write or tell those you love how much you care about them.

 If money is an issue, think about giving cheaper gifts that will create a special memory for others, like home baked cookies wrapped in nice paper, a beautiful Christmas Tree ornament, or a poem written in beautiful paper and laminated. These things will be remembered much more than expensive trinkets. 

This Christmas also take time to bring warmth back into your home. If you are musical, choose a new song to sing/play each year, or create fun games to play like sherades to break the ice and detract from negative energies. 

Don't make presents the centre of attention - make little cards with one word that signifies what the person means to you & attach these to your gifts. 

 Focus on the blessings you all have in your life. Ask each person to say 1 thing they are grateful for and one thing they are excited about in the New Year. Change the focus and mood by playing happy and fun Christmas music. 

Make this a Christmas to remember - for all the good reasons!

If you don't celebrate Christmas still take the time to focus on your blessings and on those you love. Make someone you love a card that tells him/her how much you care and appreciate having this person in your life.

Life will always be filled with ups and downs. If you are feeling a loss at Christmas - turn it around as much as possible. Remember the good times and what you are grateful for right now. It's not easy, but if you give thanks at the same time that you grieve, the pain will be just that bit more tolerable.

Focus on love and more love will come...

For more support contact Happy Life at: www.happylife.net.au

Or email at: info@happylife.net.au

Learning to trust your instincts

The daily punishment you can place your body & mind under - as a result of constant negative feedback - can leave you with a lack of trust in your inner instincts. You can learn over time that it's not safe to trust that inner voice that tells you it's time to speak up (particularly when there is a chance you may get hurt). 

Why might you feel insecure in your ability to trust your instincts? 

Often this happens as a result of rejections and others letting you down. When you are rejected by someone you love you can easily learn (incorrectly) that you are not a worthy person and also learn that your instincts about this person were not accurate. You can begin to wonder if you really can trust your guidance system that has led you into a situation where pain has been the outcome. 

Add to this when those you care about regularly let you down, you can learn not to trust your inner guidance system who once again led you to these relationships. 

What we tend to quickly forget is that 99.9% of times your inner voice has tried to warn you about others who may not be the best 'fit' for you, but you have allowed your desires 'in the moment' to drive your behaviour and hence pushed forward with people who time and time again let you down. 

The question you need to ask yourself is "when will I start to realise the importance of listening to my instincts?"

When you repeatedly ignore your inner voice you leave yourself vulnerable. You are vulnerable to:

-) being hurt by those who do not truly show you the respect you deserve

-) ignoring potential errors that could lead to future problems

-) rejecting opportunities to stretch your wings and be the person you truly want to be

-) not standing up for yourself

-) others developing an inaccurate picture of you

So you can see, learning to pay attention when your intuition is trying to speak up, is vital to your overall health, happiness and success in life.

Start today! 

Start to listen to your inner voice. Don't rush into decisions. Give yourself time and permission to do things in your own time. Don't ignore your inner drives - particularly out of fear. Act - when your instincts tell you to speak up. 

Trust your instincts - one instinct at a time!

For more support and inspiration visit Happy Life at: www.hapoylife.net.au

Mapping out goals is crucial to personal & professional achievement

Do you have desires but find yourself self-sabotaging your success by not following through? 

The main 2 reasons goals are not realised are:

1) no clear roadmap for success

2) no commitment to the roadmap

Designing a roadmap to achieve your desires is extremely important, yet is often not undertaken, because it takes time. 

Let's take a common goal: weightloss/fitness. 

Most people who want to lose weight, but do not take the time to map out exactly what they have to do & how these requirements can fit in with current personal and professional commitments. So, even if they purchase a good plan (eg a weightloss program) they have not taken the time to adjust the program to make sure the requirements are achievable in view of current life commitments to work, home life, family and friends.

Another common example is in business. Many individuals have a desire to start a new business venture but do not take adequate time to write out and stick to a regularly updated business plan. They also do not take time to think about short/medium/long term goals and how these are going to be achieved - devising a plan for current gaps & business requirements in order to realise their dreams.

The second aspect - commitment is even more vital.

So often people say they want to achieve a goal but are not fully committed to it. In their heirachy of importance, they think it's up the top, but in reality the goal regularly takes a back seat to other priorities. In such instances individuals need to spend time thinking about whether the goal really is that important to them right now - in view of other commitments that continue to take precedent. If they don't take time to do this, they regularly feel depressed about not achieving a currently unrealistic goal. However, if they take time to really assess their level of commitment, they can discuss their desires with others in their life and accommodate requests accordingly.

It's easy to look at other successful people who have what you want and feel sad about your lack of success. However most of the time there has been planning and commitment behind their successes & this part is often forgotten. 

Take the time to map out your goals and then commit to each stage of your journey, so you can live in the moment & feel good about the fact that each step you commit to take along your journey takes you one step closer to your goals.

To find out How to improve your self esteem Click on this link, or visit www.selfesteemonline.com.au 

How much are you willing to do to achieve your desires

How much time do you spend feeling frustrated, depressed and angry because other people seem to be able to achieve what you desire - so easily? If you look closely you will find that whilst others may have acquired your goals quicker than you, there will be many things that they desire which you obtained more easily and most likely with less effort. The privilege of success in every aspect of life is not simply given to you (some aspects of life will always be easier & harder - depending on your life circumstance). So, when you really desire something, some planning & determination goes a long way.

If something is feasible - then it is possible. It's that simple. Thus, if you're aiming to be a model and you're told you are not tall enough, you're trying to be an artist and you can't draw, or you're trying to be a professional singer and you can't hold a note, then yes it is probably time to learn more about where your best strengths really lie. However, most of your desires are things you know in your heart you CAN achieve. It's a matter of pushing through every struggle and knowing with every fibre of your being that you are closer than you think.

One of the other issues that often stops you from achieving your desires is having the right strategy/plan and following through with it - diligently.

So, let's say you are looking for a partner. The first part of your strategy is working out what type of person you're looking for. Then, working out where this type of person would hang out. For instance:

- If you love partying - attend the same parties
- If you love exercising - join a club within your area of interest
- If you love travel - travel in a tour group with singles in your age bracket
- If you love design - attend trade shows, seminars & workshops in your chosen area of interest

Therefore, your strategy is to put yourself in an environment where you will be meeting similar minded singles that you are likely to want to date. Then follow through with your action.

The last part of the action plan is believing you are good enough to receive it when it comes. So this means when you are speaking to people who can help you achieve your goal - acting in a calm and confident manner. Further, when positive opportunities present themselves, don't be afraid to say "yes". Avoid self sabotaging your success out of a fear of not being good enough.

Finally, it's very important not to compromise on your goals to please others. In the example above, don't make excuses for negative behavior. When striving for your goals be persistent, determined and self confident. In doing do, you will not place yourself in uncompromising positions to get there and you will be focused and ready to strive for success & accept it when it comes your way.

Believe that everything is possible & you deserve it. Then don't give up!!!

How to reduce stress to improve health and improve happiness

There is countless research regarding the effects of stress on your internal and external body. In fact, there is mounting evidence to support the complement of western medicine and alternative medicine to treat illness (stress reduction programs playing a very important role here). Stress is a very broad term, encompassing anxiety, worry, physiological & chemical body distress (eg being cold for too long, being over tired, being overworked) and so on.

There is a very strong connection between the mind and the body, yet many times it takes a physical manifestation to occur before individuals do something to minimize the stress. For instance, you'll wait until you experience significant stomach pain, headaches or back ache, before deciding to become actively involved in meditation, Pilates, or mindfulness practice.

The ideal, however, is to consistently train your mind to become more resilient to the inevitable stress around you. For instance, if you're struggling with financial worry, every time you receive a new bill, you are likely to be filled with panic, dread and physical illness as a result of prolonged stress. Negative stress tends to manifest in the head (headache pain) or the stomach areas of the body and thus can cause significant discomfort, resulting in further stress.

In order to minimize stress it's important to design a plan to manage your current situation, stick to your plan and move forward. An example of this plan would be to stagger your pay cheque according to your urgent bills and lifestyle and to put away specific amounts of money to pay off debt and have some fun. As long as the bare minimum is being paid, you can reduce stress and then focus on new ways to increase your income.

Worry can become a habit, so much so that you can learn to create worries when one does not appear to exist. Thus, it's important to also start paying attention to your worry cue's. This will help you to direct your relaxation efforts to the right time and place. It is also crucial to learn when you are most likely to be stressed and use these times to implement stress reduction strategies, such as controlled breathing, acceptance of the situation and belief in your ability to cope with anything life throws at you.

Therefore, stress reduction (along with healthy eating and regular exercise) not only improve your overall mood, but have been shown to have such a great impact on your health that they can reverse illnesses, reduce your chances of becoming ill and reduce your likelihood of relapse - should you fall ill.

It is so easy to push your body beyond its limits and then feel disappointed when your body gives up and decides it needs a break. Changing your lifestyle to incorporate healthy living is the greatest gift you can bestow on yourself. Life has enough ups and downs - why make the struggle harder by ignoring your self. You are worth so much more and deserve to live a happy and healthy life