Eat chocolate to beat depression

When you start to notice that you're getting that depressed feeling again, it's important to try to shake it as soon as possible so that it doesn't take hold of you. Depression is often the result of negative thoughts, however many times it is the result of a physiological imbalance. This imbalance occurrs as a result of low levels of the brain chemical serotonin.

Chocolate can have an empowering effect on brain chemicals when used effectively and in moderation. Chocolate has been found to have a calming effect on the brain. Thus, the next time you're feeling 'the blues' coming on, reach for a small block of chocolate and see how it instantly improves your mood.

It is important to use it in moderation, otherwise the sugar and fat will negate the positive effects on mood. However, it certainly is a great way to snap you out of a negative spell when you need an instant pick me up.

Put a stop to fear of rejection

One of the simplest ways to reduce fear of rejection is by paying close attention to your perception of the world around you. When you have a fear of being rejected you are often second guessing what people around you might be thinking or feeling about you.

For instance, when you say "no" to someone who asks you to do a favour and you don't hear from them for a while. Your mind starts to panic and you start to berate yourself for saying "no". You assume that this person hates you now and this leads to you thinking you're a bad person. You don't calm down until you hear from the person and find out that everything is OK. All the anxiety in this situation is 'self-driven'. The anxiety is driven from a belief that if you say "no' to people they won't like you any more and as a result you conclude that you 'must' be a bad person.

The first step in combating this unhelpful thinking style is to start to pay attention to all the times in your day when your mind starts racing to fill in the gaps.

• Do you assume something is wrong with you, if people look at you a certain way?
• Do you worry about what you're going to wear, just case people see a potential flaw in your body?
• Do you avoid people who you think might ask a favour of you, out of fear of saying "no"?

Most people are worrying too much about their own issues to focus on yours, so start to believe this and put a stop to negative thinking. Tell yourself you're not going to engage in this type of thinking any more.

It will take time, because it's a long ingrained bad habits. However, the more you practice the better you'll become and the happier you will be!

What are you afraid of?

Fear. It's a very debilitating emotion. Have you ever been scared of what someone might say if you stood up for yourself? When you find yourself in this position ask yourself - 'what am i afraid of here?'.

For instance, let's say you have a friend who is quite insecure. You love her, but you don't want her to take on her negative baggage out on you all the time. Every time she says something that insinuates you're not putting her first, or that you don't have a right to feel the way you'd like you, you feel anxious and just give in to her demands. Let's say she's been calling you for a few days and you're avoiding returning the call because you don't want the stress associated with talking to her. At this point, ask yourself that question. 'What are you afraid of?' In essence you are scared of her making another negative comment. But... what if you decided not to be scared any more. After all, she's made these comments many times before and nothing bad happened. You're avoiding her anyway. So why not tell yourself that she can feel however she wants. You're not giving in to her demands and she is not someone warranted of fear. Words can only hurt if you allow them to.

Now if when you call she goes down the same track, you simply do not give ANY fuel to her comments. This is easier when you have been calm BEFORE making the return phone call. You have to retrain the friend to understand that you're not going to pander to her insecurities any longer.

What are you waiting for?

Are you saying "i'll be happy when..." It's so easy to be caught in a pattern of wishing for the future and not living in the present. The main problem with this way of thinking is that there will always be something in the future that you desire. This is not a bad thing. It's fine to be excited about your journey in life. However, the secret is learning how to enjoy the present.

Look to the future for your desires, but then take time out to enjoy your current life and the things you have in your environment. Your life will always have SOMETHING to be grateful for. When you're in this positive head space you are able to think much more clearly about how to set goals to achieve those things you'd like to achieve in the future.

Stop saying "yes"

If your life is overfilled with commitments and you are feeling tired and overworked, you may have issues with saying "yes" and "no" in inapropriate times. Many intelligent people feel guilty when they are not busy, this can be a product of living in a society that encourages filling in every spare moment of your day with 'tasks'.

It can be difficult to say "no" when you don't have something specifically planned - the person asking often places pressure on you by saying "but you're not doing anything". The underlying message here is that your time - just for you - is not that important. If you don't value yourself, then you are more likely to feel guilty for saying "no" and then resent the fact that you're only giving in to appease this guilt.

The take home message - is that you HAVE to make YOU an important and valuable part of your life, otherwise how can you expect others to value you? If you need some time to yourself, it's OK to say 'I'd be happy to help another time, but at the moment I need some time to relax'. By nurturing yourself you help others because you are in a clearer frame of mind and can approach 'dificult' people in a more calm and rational manner.

Is sugar making you look older?

Most nutritionists will tell you that sugar is one of the negative foods in your diet. It's an ingredient that is very difficult to avoid if you're not paying attention. Foods such as pasta sauce, yoghurt, spreads, crackers and chewing gum are laden with sugar to enhance taste.

So what's wrong with sugar?
Many health professionals state that sugar changes the appearance of your skin. If you are looking more tired, drawn out and 'blotchy' than normal, it may be that you have too much sugar in your diet. If you're a person that tries to eat healthy foods, start paying attention to the processed foods in your diet to see what effect they might be having.

The good news
The exciting thing is the effects of sugar on your health are irreversible. You'll start to see results very quickly. This is why people report such healthy looking skin of the Refresh Your Life program (see: http://www.happylife.net.au/Products_Refresh_Your_Life.html). This program makes it easy to eat low sugary foods, in a balanced way. We all love our chocolates and sweets, so if you make sure you include them in your lifestyle in a sensible way, you'll look good, lose weight, feel happy and enjoy the treats too.

Where do you find your inspiration?

Inspiration can serve as a great motivator. For instance, if you love music, why not make sure that you have a number of playlists that get you excited and shift any negative mindsets - on the spot? Music is a great way to feel positive and to be in the moment. If you use your imagination it can transport you to places where the music has made you feel alive - say when dancing, at a special event such as a wedding, or when travelling.

Music has the power to evoke incredibly positive emotions and to boost your energy levels in an instant. It doesn't cost very much to download these days and yet the impact can be enormous.

The next time you're feeling a bit 'down', put on a song and have a dance - even get your partner and children involved. There's nothing more special than dancing with your kids whilst they make up their own moves. These are special moments that bring you closer together and shake up the cobwebs - leaving you in a more positive and inspired state.