How much time do you spend feeling frustrated, depressed and angry because other people seem to be able to achieve what you desire - so easily? If you look closely you will find that whilst others may have acquired your goals quicker than you, there will be many things that they desire which you obtained more easily and most likely with less effort. The privilege of success in every aspect of life is not simply given to you (some aspects of life will always be easier & harder - depending on your life circumstance). So, when you really desire something, some planning & determination goes a long way.
If something is feasible - then it is possible. It's that simple. Thus, if you're aiming to be a model and you're told you are not tall enough, you're trying to be an artist and you can't draw, or you're trying to be a professional singer and you can't hold a note, then yes it is probably time to learn more about where your best strengths really lie. However, most of your desires are things you know in your heart you CAN achieve. It's a matter of pushing through every struggle and knowing with every fibre of your being that you are closer than you think.
One of the other issues that often stops you from achieving your desires is having the right strategy/plan and following through with it - diligently.
So, let's say you are looking for a partner. The first part of your strategy is working out what type of person you're looking for. Then, working out where this type of person would hang out. For instance:
- If you love partying - attend the same parties
- If you love exercising - join a club within your area of interest
- If you love travel - travel in a tour group with singles in your age bracket
- If you love design - attend trade shows, seminars & workshops in your chosen area of interest
Therefore, your strategy is to put yourself in an environment where you will be meeting similar minded singles that you are likely to want to date. Then follow through with your action.
The last part of the action plan is believing you are good enough to receive it when it comes. So this means when you are speaking to people who can help you achieve your goal - acting in a calm and confident manner. Further, when positive opportunities present themselves, don't be afraid to say "yes". Avoid self sabotaging your success out of a fear of not being good enough.
Finally, it's very important not to compromise on your goals to please others. In the example above, don't make excuses for negative behavior. When striving for your goals be persistent, determined and self confident. In doing do, you will not place yourself in uncompromising positions to get there and you will be focused and ready to strive for success & accept it when it comes your way.
Believe that everything is possible & you deserve it. Then don't give up!!!
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Saturday, January 19, 2013
How to reduce stress to improve health and improve happiness
There is countless research regarding the effects of stress on your internal and external body. In fact, there is mounting evidence to support the complement of western medicine and alternative medicine to treat illness (stress reduction programs playing a very important role here). Stress is a very broad term, encompassing anxiety, worry, physiological & chemical body distress (eg being cold for too long, being over tired, being overworked) and so on.
There is a very strong connection between the mind and the body, yet many times it takes a physical manifestation to occur before individuals do something to minimize the stress. For instance, you'll wait until you experience significant stomach pain, headaches or back ache, before deciding to become actively involved in meditation, Pilates, or mindfulness practice.
The ideal, however, is to consistently train your mind to become more resilient to the inevitable stress around you. For instance, if you're struggling with financial worry, every time you receive a new bill, you are likely to be filled with panic, dread and physical illness as a result of prolonged stress. Negative stress tends to manifest in the head (headache pain) or the stomach areas of the body and thus can cause significant discomfort, resulting in further stress.
In order to minimize stress it's important to design a plan to manage your current situation, stick to your plan and move forward. An example of this plan would be to stagger your pay cheque according to your urgent bills and lifestyle and to put away specific amounts of money to pay off debt and have some fun. As long as the bare minimum is being paid, you can reduce stress and then focus on new ways to increase your income.
Worry can become a habit, so much so that you can learn to create worries when one does not appear to exist. Thus, it's important to also start paying attention to your worry cue's. This will help you to direct your relaxation efforts to the right time and place. It is also crucial to learn when you are most likely to be stressed and use these times to implement stress reduction strategies, such as controlled breathing, acceptance of the situation and belief in your ability to cope with anything life throws at you.
Therefore, stress reduction (along with healthy eating and regular exercise) not only improve your overall mood, but have been shown to have such a great impact on your health that they can reverse illnesses, reduce your chances of becoming ill and reduce your likelihood of relapse - should you fall ill.
It is so easy to push your body beyond its limits and then feel disappointed when your body gives up and decides it needs a break. Changing your lifestyle to incorporate healthy living is the greatest gift you can bestow on yourself. Life has enough ups and downs - why make the struggle harder by ignoring your self. You are worth so much more and deserve to live a happy and healthy life
There is a very strong connection between the mind and the body, yet many times it takes a physical manifestation to occur before individuals do something to minimize the stress. For instance, you'll wait until you experience significant stomach pain, headaches or back ache, before deciding to become actively involved in meditation, Pilates, or mindfulness practice.
The ideal, however, is to consistently train your mind to become more resilient to the inevitable stress around you. For instance, if you're struggling with financial worry, every time you receive a new bill, you are likely to be filled with panic, dread and physical illness as a result of prolonged stress. Negative stress tends to manifest in the head (headache pain) or the stomach areas of the body and thus can cause significant discomfort, resulting in further stress.
In order to minimize stress it's important to design a plan to manage your current situation, stick to your plan and move forward. An example of this plan would be to stagger your pay cheque according to your urgent bills and lifestyle and to put away specific amounts of money to pay off debt and have some fun. As long as the bare minimum is being paid, you can reduce stress and then focus on new ways to increase your income.
Worry can become a habit, so much so that you can learn to create worries when one does not appear to exist. Thus, it's important to also start paying attention to your worry cue's. This will help you to direct your relaxation efforts to the right time and place. It is also crucial to learn when you are most likely to be stressed and use these times to implement stress reduction strategies, such as controlled breathing, acceptance of the situation and belief in your ability to cope with anything life throws at you.
Therefore, stress reduction (along with healthy eating and regular exercise) not only improve your overall mood, but have been shown to have such a great impact on your health that they can reverse illnesses, reduce your chances of becoming ill and reduce your likelihood of relapse - should you fall ill.
It is so easy to push your body beyond its limits and then feel disappointed when your body gives up and decides it needs a break. Changing your lifestyle to incorporate healthy living is the greatest gift you can bestow on yourself. Life has enough ups and downs - why make the struggle harder by ignoring your self. You are worth so much more and deserve to live a happy and healthy life
Friday, January 11, 2013
Happiness gained through enjoying the journey
From a very young age we are taught to aim high, look to the future and wait for happiness to arrive after we have achieved our goals. The consequence of thinking like this is that happiness is only ever short lived. When we reach these goals we are not taught the skills of appreciating and enjoying the pleasure of this success. Being future goal driven, we soon forget the successes we achieve (or forget the enjoyment we felt after achieving our goals). Our minds soon focus on the next thing we need to achieve in order to be happy. Then term "I'll be happy when..." Becomes all too familiar.
The problem with this type of thinking is that it's ingrained from a very young age. We are rewarded and encouraged for working really hard, achieving good grades, making the team, getting the partner and so on... However, these end points lend themselves to the search for new goals to fulfill our deeper need to achieve first - in order to find happiness.
As a result of happiness being attached to success, we often feel negative emotions such as depression and anxiety when we fail to reach the goals we set our for ourselves (or when we fail to meet others expectations). Thus, happiness becomes dependent on success.
What a difference a simple change in mindset could make!
Imagine the difference in your life if you could change your thinking to focus on the enjoyment of the present - the journey towards your achievements as well as the final success. Whilst it may take a little practice, changing your thinking simply takes dedication and persistence. The payoff to realizing how much happiness you have in your life right now (whilst simultaneously being excited about what the achievement of your goal will enhance in your life) is enormous.
According to the law of attraction, being in a positive state whilst traveling along the journey to achieve your goals will create a similar vibration and enhance the likelihood that you will achieve your goals. But more importantly, taking time to realize how great even small aspects of your life are right now gives you the opportunity to live your life, rather than waste it focussing continuously in the future and never really living in and enjoying the present moment.
A great way to start shifting your mindset is via making a mental list before going to bed every night of all the things you are happy about right now, such as:
- your physical body is alive and functioning
- your family (or certain members of it)
- your home (you have shelter, water & food)
- your mind (having the intelligence to create your own happiness)
- your job (you have the capacity to earn money)
This process is not about saying "I should just be satisfied with what I have". It's about acknowledging that despite your struggles, on balance you can find things to be happy about right now. You can then use these qualities to give you more strength and trust that you can and will achieve more in your life.
The problem with this type of thinking is that it's ingrained from a very young age. We are rewarded and encouraged for working really hard, achieving good grades, making the team, getting the partner and so on... However, these end points lend themselves to the search for new goals to fulfill our deeper need to achieve first - in order to find happiness.
As a result of happiness being attached to success, we often feel negative emotions such as depression and anxiety when we fail to reach the goals we set our for ourselves (or when we fail to meet others expectations). Thus, happiness becomes dependent on success.
What a difference a simple change in mindset could make!
Imagine the difference in your life if you could change your thinking to focus on the enjoyment of the present - the journey towards your achievements as well as the final success. Whilst it may take a little practice, changing your thinking simply takes dedication and persistence. The payoff to realizing how much happiness you have in your life right now (whilst simultaneously being excited about what the achievement of your goal will enhance in your life) is enormous.
According to the law of attraction, being in a positive state whilst traveling along the journey to achieve your goals will create a similar vibration and enhance the likelihood that you will achieve your goals. But more importantly, taking time to realize how great even small aspects of your life are right now gives you the opportunity to live your life, rather than waste it focussing continuously in the future and never really living in and enjoying the present moment.
A great way to start shifting your mindset is via making a mental list before going to bed every night of all the things you are happy about right now, such as:
- your physical body is alive and functioning
- your family (or certain members of it)
- your home (you have shelter, water & food)
- your mind (having the intelligence to create your own happiness)
- your job (you have the capacity to earn money)
This process is not about saying "I should just be satisfied with what I have". It's about acknowledging that despite your struggles, on balance you can find things to be happy about right now. You can then use these qualities to give you more strength and trust that you can and will achieve more in your life.
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