Tuesday, February 25, 2014

How focussing on the negatives can create a prisoner in your own mind

One of the most common patterns of thinking involves focussing (and regularly discussing) how bad you feel because you don't yet have what you desire. Classic thoughts of lack include:

* My home is too small or too old

* I am getting too old to have children

*I don't have enough money

*I hate my body

*I am tired all the time

*I don't have any great friends

*I will never have a great intimate relationship 

It's human nature to ponder on these beliefs and to discuss them with your friends and relatives. However, if the majority of your thoughts are in this headspace, you are likely to lose track of reality as these thoughts begin to infiltrate your very existence. You can become consumed by them, to the point where you rarely allow you to have fun and relax. Instead you find yourself complaining about the same issues over and over again in the hope that either you, or someone else will find the perfect solution for you. Yet this rarely occurs.

Speaking regularly about things you currently are unable to change leaves you feeling trapped and a complete hostage to your negative thoughts and beliefs. Yes, we all need to vent our frustrations from time to time. However, when you are complaining without finding potential solutions to your problems and then actively taking decisive action to change your life for the positive - you are simply living within the confines of an imprisoned mind.

It's important to regularly check in with yourself and take note of the conversations you have with those closest to you. For instance, you may regularly be complaining about the job you hate, the boss who is a bully, the friend who lets you down, the baby you really desire and the partner you long for. If this is the case, assess the outcome of these conversations. Have you had any breakthroughs and changed your life as a result of these conversations? Your answer to this question will be quite telling. If you are having these conversations regularly it is most likely that you're either making little or no progress, are in a situation that can't be altered right now, or you simply are not ready to step out of your comfort zone to change. Be aware of where you sit in terms of wanting change.

Life will always throw dilemmas our way. However, it is part of our growth to learn from these issues and to take action to positively impact your life and those you care for.

To find more support and inspiration visit: www.happylife.net.au

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